Ralph, Garth, and a Couple of Heroes

I'm not sure how I missed the news, but I just learned that Mary Grace Canfield (Ralph Monroe) passed away last week.

Bummer.

Oh well, at least she can now hook up with Hank Kimball at the great Pixley Bijou in the sky.

In other news, I guess Michael Phelps didn't win any medals at the Olympics this time. Hmm.

I didn't get to see that much of the competition, but from what I could tell, my skiing skills (even as they were back in college) probably wouldn't get me on the podium these days. Back when I was catching "big air", you could barely fit a tribble between my skis and the snow...and I thought I was practically in orbit. But these guys were making Evel Knievel look like a pteromerhanophobe.

I don't think I'll ever really understand the bobsled events. I would rather see them race their sleds across a frozen lake, so they'd have to push the entire way. That would seem more interesting to me. Not that there's anything wrong with gravity...

Oh, and by the way, the clip from "Zorro the Gay Blade" relates to the Winter Olympics because the music they play as Zorro gallops away is one of the songs that Brian Boitano skated to back when he was the Olympic champion. (It was adapted from "The Adventures of Don Juan," by Max Steiner.) It might be the second best riding song ever.

On a completely different topic, have you ever woken up laughing out loud?

I'm not sure I ever had until this weekend. I wish I could remember the dream in more detail, and especially the jokes, but I know it was hilarious.

All I can remember was that I was hanging out with Lord Garth, a 20-year-old Cher, and a blond that was either Heather Locklear, Elizabeth Mongomery, or some delightful combination of the two. Garth was entertaining us all with an impromptu stand-up routine about Obamacare and hobbits -- and everyone was rolling on the floor.

Usually I'm OK with waking up, but after that dream, I found myself truly disappointed that I had returned to reality. Still, the good feelings of humor and camaraderie persisted, and I found myself grinning throughout the morning.

I just wish I could remember the jokes. Oh well.

The rest of the weekend was good, too. On Saturday, I traveled with uber-historian David Dean Barrett out to Julesburg, Colorado to videotape a couple of veterans interviews.

If you have any spare time, and any interest in the foundation of greatness of the United States, I would strongly urge you to spend some time as a volunteer for the American Patriots History Association. It is a humbling and inspiring experience to listen to the stories of these wonderful guys who have fought for liberty and contributed so much to our country. Plus, every single interview contains some fascinating glimpse into a topic I had never imagined.

The first interview was with Lee Kizer, a Navy signalman whose ship was hit by a Kamikaze. He lost his front teeth in that attack...but it wasn't from an explosion or gunfire or anything. As the Kamikaze plane approached the bridge of his ship, the crew was ordered to run for cover, and he forgot that his headset was plugged into the command console. As he ran to exit the bridge, he reached the end of the cord like a dog reaching the end of his leash. He went down, as did all of the guys behind him, forming a pile that kept any of them reaching the doorway.

Fortunately, the Kamikaze hit elsewhere, causing damage that flooded the crew quarters; but it did not sink the ship. But even though his teeth fell out from the incident, he never saw a doctor nor applied for a Purple Heart.

After the war, he built a couple of successful businesses in Julesburg -- including a barbershop that he still operates in his 90s. He also dealt in real estate. And in his spare time, he has built an impressive museum that contains immaculate articles from bygone times. His collection includes magazines, newspapers, cars, bicycles, and a fascinating collection of old-time gasoline pumps. If that weren't enough, he has also restored the town's old ballroom dance hall, complete with many of the original musical instruments that were used by the swing bands that played there. When asked how he managed to accomplish so much in his life, he was ready with an answer: "I never took up golf," he said.



The other gentleman we interviewed was Ralph Turner, an infantry soldier who was captured by the Germans and spent nearly a year in various prison camps. As you can imagine, it wasn't anything like Hogan's Heroes. There were no daring escapes...their freedom was finally obtained when the Germans simply vacated the camp as the Allied forces drew near. The guys woke up one morning to find that they no longer had any guards. He still kept a notebook with a signature from the Welsh soldier in charge of the unit that helped get them on their way home.

Anyway, it was, as always, an honor and a privilege to record the stories of Mr. Kizer and Mr. Turner. If you ever visit Julesburg, but sure to stop by the museum, which is in the Old Ford Garage on main street. You can't miss it. And if you'd like to become part of this important history project, please contact APHA.

The rest of my weekend was consumed by the usual litany of chores and bookkeeping. I'm not sure how happy I should be about this one -- but I did manage to get my bank set up to automatically make my car payments. And I finally picked up my license plate so I can get the temp tag out of my back window. The fun part of Sunday, though, was timing each of the Brute Squad events at swim practice. I felt pretty good...but learned that I probably should've entered slower times for the State Meet.

Oh well, it probably doesn't matter where I'm seeded. In most of my events, the difference between a great swim and a terrible swim probably won't change my placing within my age group. And no matter how fast I go, I know I'll have fun at the meet. But it wouldn't hurt me to work out pretty hard for the next several weeks, would it?

Which reminds me, it's time to do my stretching, so I'm outtahere. Have a great day!