Cultural Temptations

I'm currently working a job where I have an 80-mile commute each day. On some mornings when the traffic's not too bad, I can take the scenic route through the lovely town of Golden and north along Highway 93 -- which offers some appealing views of both the mountains and the plains. This route takes me past the remnants of the old nuclear facility and the county dump, as well as a farm that grows giant windmills. But coming home that way at night is a risky proposition indeed. Not only is the traffic worse in the evenings, but so is my eyesight...and since sunset is the time when Bambi and his dimwit cousins come down from the hillsides to frolic in the traffic.

[Why did the deer cross the road? Because he wanted to play chicken! Get it?]

You know, if PETA really cared about animals, they'd set up educational seminars in the forest, complete with dramatic presentations showing the dangers of highways crossings. "This is your brain. This is your brain embedded in the grill of a Peterbilt." -- that sort of thing.

[Two-part trivia question: Do you know what the phrase "Cab-over Pete with a reefer on" means? And, do you know where it comes from? Answer in the next post. Bonus points if you know which small Colorado town's former mayor is involved in the answer.]

Anyway, the point is that I've been taking the city route home. Rather than risking wildlife encounters on Hwy 93, I have chosen to drive straight south on Wadsworth Blvd each evening. Yes, it does mean a lot of stop 'n go, tons of brake lights, and plenty of opportunities to listen to 200-decibel rap music from low-rider Chevies while waiting at traffic lights. It also provides plenty of good bumper sticker reading ("My Smith & Wesson is smarter than your honor student", "Don't blame me -- I voted for Pat Paulsen", "You can't hug a child with nuclear arms, unless you're Radioactive Man", etc.)

But the main non-safety-related benefit of taking the city route home is the opportunity to see the local culture along the way. Oh sure, most of it is the same stuff you see everywhere: golden arches, banks, Wal- and various other types of Marts, Geico billboards, and auto parts stores. But the interesting stuff comes in the form of the local restaurants and pawn shops. Not only are the buildings themselves often interesting, but so is the signage. "Casa de Flema!" "Cash for Unicycles!" "Jewelry -- Cremation -- Ice Cream!"

I wish I had time to stop to visit some of these unique businesses, but by the time I get out of the office there's only enough time to drive home, grab a quick bite and go to bed. My schedule is too tightly packed for tourism and absorption of Wheat Ridgian cultures; much less daily blogging, laundry, and personal hygiene. Oh well, this particular assignment won't go on much longer, so I'm hoping to be able to spend more time exploring this city (and others) and chronicling my adventures thereof.

I'm actually expecting to be able to take a vacation in the next month or so, and I hope to resume regular postings soon as well. I really do appreciate your continued patronage, and hope to provide some enlightening travelogues in the near future. In the meantime, watch out for critters on the roadways, and have a great day!