Potpourri

For some reason known only to the French, the "t" in "potpourri" is silent. It's pronounced "Poe-poo-ree". And because they seem to enjoy messing with us, they also call a train station a "Dee-poe", and the villain from "Rocky II" is known as "Mr. (silence)."

I guess they don't drink anything with their crumpets, either.

Anyway, depite its frenchness, "potpourri" is a cromulent word, and it describes my approach to today's blog. I suppose I could have used "Salmagundi" instead, but that sounds too much like the stage name for an Italian magician.

Anyway, the point is that I don't have a single topic to discuss at length today, but instead will offer short observations on a variety of topics, presented in bullet form. Let us begin:

• Track Practice—We are a third of the way to the equinox, and it's starting to stay light until after I get off work. Whoo hoo! My brother and I took advantage of this by running at the track yesterday evening. My hamstrings were a bit tight, so I was afraid to really open it up; I do NOT want to hurt myself. So instead of lengthening my stride, I concentrated on foot cadence and keeping a fast turnover rate. My "hummingbird" cadence is roughly equivalent to a normal person's "three-toed ground sloth" cadence, but the point is that I forced myself to go faster than was comfortable...and therefore hopefully achieved some sort of training effect. I can feel it in my legs this morning, and that's good.


• The Metric System—Isn't it strange how random thoughts from the deep past will suddenly appear and tap you on the shoulder? For reasons I cannot possibly fathom, the name of my 7th-Grade science teacher popped into my head this morning: Cornelius Jongedyke. What a great name!
  
  "Uncle Corny", as we called him (but not to his face), was a fine teacher, and had a passion for the subject matter. But I will never forget how careful he was when tiptoeing around the theory of evolution. It was clear that his personal opinion was squarely on the side of fossil evidence, but he made it a point to ensure us that Darwin's theory wasn't necessarily in conflict with religious teachings. At the time, it puzzled me that he spent so much energy presenting a viewpoint he obviously didn't believe...but this was before I had heard of the Scopes Trial or the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
  
  The other thing I remember about that class was that I shared a lab table with a kid named Darrell Bybee. I was the smallest and weakest kid in the class, and he was the largest and strongest, so it made perfect evolutionary sense that he would threaten to beat me up each day if I didn't do his homework for him and let him cheat off of me on tests. I never did those things -- and he never did beat me up -- so I concluded that Darwinism might not have universal applicability.
  
  Anyway, the point is that Mr. Jongedyke insisted on using the metric system for all our science experiments, and that was fine with me. In fact, when I was first exposed to centimeters and grams and such (3rd grade? 4th?), I remember thinking "This is simply too logical not to be adopted. The USA will obviously be totally metric by 1970."
  
  After seeing "The Empire Strikes Back", I also predicted that Yoda's cryptic "There is another" comment to Obi Wan's ghost meant that Jabba the Hutt would turn out to be a secret Jedi, and would be the one to whup Vader in the final episode.
  
  The lesson to be learned here is that if you hear me make a confident pronouncement about the future, it's probably best to bet on the exact opposite.
  
  Hmm. Have you ever noticed how Yoda sorta resembles Edgar Allan Poe?
  
  And speaking of football playoffs, did you know that Poe is from Baltimore, whose team is named the "Ravens"? I'm sure if he were alive today, he'd be a frequent guest on the "NFL Today" show, where he'd be asked to create poems about the Ravens and their chances for the SuperBowl.
  
  Deep among the playoff dances
  I pondered on the Raven's chances
  Of all the teams, just one advances; will it be our Baltimore?
  From locker rooms all dark and shady
  There rose a fearless man named Brady
  With lions courage, on he played; he found a way to boost the score.
  The Ravens moved on...nevermore.
  
  Hmm, perhaps it's best that Mr. Poe continues to rest in peace, eh?


• Perpetuity—A swimmer I ran into at the gym this morning asked me if I was still coaching for Foothills. At first it struck me as an odd question -- of course I'm still coaching there. But then I realized that I'm operating under an unspoken assumption. I hadn't really ever voiced this thought, but some part of my brain has taken for granted the idea that I will continue to coach this team until I'm as dead and buried as ol' Edgar Allan. (What's ol' Ed doing today? Decom-Poe-zing. Ar ar.) Under close analysis, my assumption turns out to be a very foolish one; there are many scenarios in which my tenure could end. The facility could close, my boss could decide to hire a younger and more charismatic coach, or they could do away with the team because we complain too much about the water temperature. I could marry Dorothy Hamill and move to New Hampshire, or could go on a European tour playing Eric Idle as part of a Monty Python tribute troupe.
  
  But...if none of those things occurs, I could definitely see myself creating workouts and yelling at swimmers for another 50 or 60 years. It's what I do.
  
  And that got me to thinking: What other things would I consider to be permanent parts of my life? Running? Well...no. Writing? Yeah, maybe, though that could take on many different forms. Laughing at my own jokes, even when nobody else sees any humor in them whatsoever? Oh, definitely.
  
  What about you? Are there any activities that are deeply embedded within your soul? My son Tanner will always be making music, and my friend Katie will always run. My filmmaker buddy Doug will always have creative ideas, and my college roommate Mickey will always make me laugh. But what about you? What defines you in such a way that you expect to carry it with you throughout your life?

OK, I had a couple of other random bullet points I was going to discuss, but I went a bit overboard on these topics. I'll save the others for another time. Until then, have a great day!