Mysteries of the Universe

Hey, when stuff like this happens, you really need to make sure all of your loved ones know how to say "Klaatu Barada Nicto"...just in case.

Even though most sources agree that the Norwegian Sky Spiral was just an incontinent Rooskie rocket, I'd really like to see the conspiracy theorists hang onto this one. I'd enjoy seeing a Fox network special in a year or so, complete with interviews of guys in lab coats who have graphs that conclusively prove that it might've been a wormhole. I bet they could dig up a witness or two who were abducted and probed that night, too.

Perhaps examining the sky spiral will help us discover what really happened to Elvis. Who knows?

But it does seem to be a season for pondering mysteries, doesn't it? I took the photo above on my trip back from California. I love those giant windmills that line the barren highways of the empty states...and these looked particularly haunting as they materialized out of the ether. But I guess they're not particularly mysterious -- so let's talk about some things that DO defy understanding.

Like why in the world Windows 7 got such good reviews. I can certainly understand people being hopeful about the new operating system...after all, Microsoft has had an entire decade to fix all the stuff that was wrong with their main product. I was optimistic that my new computer would finally run all my cool software without slowing down, freezing, and driving me crazy. But no. I shoulda bought a Mac, I guess.

Or like why people don't accelerate to highway speeds when they have a long merge lane. Or why those boxes of Christmas chocolates have those teeth-breaker crap chunks in them, when all anybody really wants are the sweet, squishy ones. Or why people buy their chocolate from anyone other than Heggy's Chocolates.

Or why nobody protests or tries to find the perpetrators when people make fun of the prophet Nostradamus. Everybody has a total conniption fit when cartoons make fun of other so-called prophets, but Nostradamus seems to be fair game. What's up with that?

And when are we going to be finished with the lame line "Nobody beats _______. Nobody!"? I thought it was used up in "Back to the Future", and here we are in, well, the future...and people are still using that phrasing to sell mattresses, cars, and who knows what else. I'm over it.

With any luck, the Norwegian wormhole will open back up and we can sneak into it, go back in time and change the movie script so that Marty says "Of course you realize...this means WAR!" I can handle that line.

In the meantime, enjoy this lovely holiday season, and always...always watch the skies.