New GPS

I woke up singing the Brady Bunch theme song. Must've been having a nightmare. And for some reason, the associated fugue of half-dreamed thoughts included the following:

Did Florence Henderson ever go by a nickname? Florence just seems too formal. Did she go by "Flo", like that odd but somehow likeable chick on the Progressive commercials? Or did she go with the more rural interpretation and ask her friends to call her "Flossie"?

I worked with a woman named Flossie when I was at Beechcraft in Wichita. The poor woman tried hard, and I truly believe she had a good heart, but she wasn't really cut out for the office environment. She tried to further her education by watching Barney the Dinosaur, but it was too fast paced for her to keep up. But I digress.

The word "Henderson" always reminds me of the old black-and-white TV show "Superman". Straight-arrow policeman, Inspector Henderson, always wore suspenders...so I called him "Inspector Suspenderson", which I thought was terribly clever. (Hey, I was 8 years old.) He was obviously no relation to Florence.

Anyway, the point is that I bought a new GPS watch. There were two problems with my old one: 1) it was gigantic, and would rub my wristbone raw on a long run, and 2) the battery only lasted a couple of hours, which made it useless for a long bike ride. The new one is smaller, supposedly has a 15-hour battery life, and is waterproof to boot. It was selling for half price on Schwaggle, and I couldn't resist the deal.

I still have a long way to go to figure out how it works. But it looks much cooler than the old Garmin did. And as we all know, cool-looking accessories are the foundation of an effective training program. Expressed scientifically:

New Watch = Better Workouts

What? You don't think I'll suddenly become a faster and less fragile runner? How can you say that? Don't you think that I'll start doing 15-hour workouts so I can test their claims regarding battery life? Don't you think I'll be swimming across the ocean to test the waterproofing? Don't you think I'll plan multiple back-to-back workouts--where I blast from sport to sport as I celebrate the multi-mode capabilities of this technology?

Well, OK, perhaps a fancy timekeeping device isn't the answer to my workout woes. I'll admit that my challenges might include a teeny-tiny little bit of laziness and sloth...and that those issues are not correctable via chronometer. But the good news is that my friend Kim has signed up to run a marathon next spring, and is willing to let me piggyback on his training program as he prepares for that. With his influence and encouragement, I am hoping to train in a less haphazard fashion, and am optimistic that I'll be ready to run the marathon with him by the time it rolls around next year. We'll see.

If nothing else, you can expect to see very precise mileage figures listed here when I do perform a running workout. Maybe even a map or two. And oh yeah, it does track heart rates, too. If I can actually convince myself to put on the shoes and haul my tail out the door, I should be having some exciting runs about which to report.

If I can put the shoes on. I guess I'll ask for your help, too, my friends. I'd appreciate the occasional gentle nudge to remind me that I'll have wasted my money if I don't put this GPS to good use. I need to get out there on the roads (and trails) and challenge this hardware to keep up with me, right?

Well, wish me luck. And have a great day!